L: I think you should write a screenplay about a guy who reads a girl's blog and falls in love with her.
Me: That's not reality. Guys don't do that. That's female wish fulfillment.
L: Isn't that what Hollywood is?
Me: Yeah, but there has to be a hint of realism to it.
L: You would fall in love with someone if they were like, this really phenomenal writer.
Me: Yeah.
L: So why can't it be the other way around?
Me: Guys don't fall in love with you because of your writing. "You've Got Mail" doesn't really exist in reality. Just in Norah Ephron's mind. And now she has all the rest of us brainwashed.
L: When did you become such a cynic?
Me: I'm just telling you no one would watch that movie because it's woefully inaccurate.
L: What about people who write passionate love-letters to each other their whole lives?
Me: When was the last time you got a passionate love letter?
L: Never. You?
Me: Six years ago. But there was a misspelling in it and it completely turned me off.
L: What was the misspelling?
Me: Monkeys. It was spelled M-O-N-K-I-E-S.
L: Someone wrote you a love-letter about monkeys?
Me: No, it just happened to mention monkeys.
L: No wonder you're so cynical.
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